I had a dream...

I had a dream the other night that was really disturbing. In the dream I thought I was facing death. I was in a truck (or possibly a bus) with all of my family, children, siblings, nieces, nephews, and I think my parents were driving. The truck was going up a huge very steep mountain and when it got near the top, the ground started to heave upward and the truck left the ground and twisted over and began to plummet down to the chasm below. I could see out of one window as the ground approached faster and faster. I remember thinking, "This is it, we're all going to die. I better pray." And I had enough time to utter the words "Father forgive me," before we crashed to the ground. I thought I was dead, but I wasn't. Then I realized that no one was but everyone had been terribly lacerated with glass. I had to pull out long splinters of glass out of my own legs to move to help carry the children. That's what I remember last from the dream, pulling out glass and carrying bodies of children.

This dream really impacted me. It made me tired and particularly emotional, maybe some of the children did die in the dream, I don't remember that so well now. I do remember that feeling as I thought I was going to become dust: fear, and at the same time, calm. I had enough sense to know that I wanted my last living words to be ones spoken to God.

Last night I dreamed about this dream again, in a different way. I dreamt that I was trying to explain it, but this time instead of a mountain, it was my parents' house that we were driving over. I have a vague memory of trying to solve the meaning of the previous dream in this dream.

I thought I'd look up some of the major elements of my dreams, although I am usually skeptical of interpretations, these were down right eerie:

To see a truck in your dream, implies that you are overworked. You may be taking on too many tasks and responsibilities and are weighing you down. On a side note, pregnant women often dream of trucks or driving trucks. This may be a metaphor of the load they are are carrying or an expression of their changing bodies.

To dream that you are riding a bus, implies that you are going along with the crowd. You are lacking originality and are taking no control over where your life is taking.

To dream that you are in a bus accident, signifies that you will find yourself in an embarrassing situation. Your finances will be effected in an adverse way causing your much frustration.

To see your own family in your dream, represents security, warmth and love. Consider also the significance of a particular family member or the relationship you have with them.

To see children in your dream, signifies your own childlike qualities or a retreat back to a childlike state. It is an extension of your inner child during a time of innocence, purity, simplicity, and a carefree attitude. You may be longing for the past and the chance to satisfy repressed desires and unfulfilled hopes. Take some time off and cater to the inner child within.

The loss of a child, signifies fallen hopes or a project.

To save a child, signifies your attempts to save a part of yourself from being destroyed.

To see mountains in your dream, signifies many major obstacles and challenges that you have to overcome. If you are on top of the mountain, then it signifies that you have achieved and realized your goals. Alternatively, mountains denotes a higher realm of consciousness, knowledge, and spiritual truth.

To dream that you are climbing a mountain, signifies your determination and ambition.

To dream that you fall off a mountain, suggests that you are in a hurry to succeed without thoroughly thinking about your path to success. It also means that you have a tendency to give up or escape from demanding situations.


To dream that you are praying, signifies a need to turn over some matter to a higher force and let it go. You need to learn to relinquish and let go of your worries. It may also be an indication that you need to pray more.

To see glass in your dream, symbolizes passivity or protection. You may be putting up an invisible barrier around you in order to protect yourself in a situation or relationship. To see broken glass in your dream, signifies a change in your life. You will find that a situation will come to an abrupt and untimely end.

Boars, Books and Best Friends

I had a little shindig this weekend, an excuse to eat Chinese food, crack open fortune cookies*, talk about and exchange books, and visit with some of my most favorite women friends. Those invited were asked to bring a book or books they would be willing to exchange, there was great deal of variety representing the diversity of my friends. We had books about pregnancy and childbirth, novels, theology, sci-fi, non-fiction, cooking, crafts and how to books, among others. Everyone went home with something new to read. I'm looking forward to reading "Me talk Pretty One Day" by David Sedaris and a couple other books I saved out. I took the remainders to the Book Thing after visiting Baltimore Clayworks with my out of towner, Tif, who needed to collect her friend's artwork that had been displayed there. It was inspiring browsing the galleries and the gift shop. There were several pieces in the teapot exhibit that made me want to get my hands back into some clay again. Thoughts are brewing for taking a class on Raku...


*Fortune cookies, I learned, are much funnier if you add the preposition "in bed" at the end. (Yeah, it's a wee bit juvenile, but still humorous.)
Here are some of my favorites from the evening:
Luck will visit you on the next new moon.
You are a gentleman of outstanding wisdom.
Speak softly and sweetly.
To be mature is to accept imperfections.
Your kindness and generosity will be appreciated by others.
Many possibilities are open to you- work a little harder.
Emotion is energy in motion.

Litany

Today for the first time in at least fifteen years, I
actually jotted down a few verses of poetry. I am not poetically inclined. I'll be the first to admit it. However, I did write lyrics for two songs for my high school boyfriend's band. The lyrics weren't awful, they weren't good either. I think what I came up with today could be good, but I am not sharing them here because 1. It's not finished (and may not ever be) 2. It could come off as....well, self absorbed, maybe. 3. I don't need the additional criticism in my life right now. I needed an outlet of self expression today and for some odd reason my mind took to poetry for a change. Anyhow, I've read a few poems today, worked at writing one, and so I thought I'd post this one by my very favorite poet, Billy Collins.

Litany

You are the bread and the knife,
The crystal goblet and the wine . . .
Jacques Crickillon

You are the bread and the knife,

the crystal goblet and the wine.

You are the dew on the morning grass

and the burning wheel of the sun.

You are the white apron of the baker

and the marsh birds suddenly in flight.

However, you are not the wind in the orchard,

the plums on the counter,

or the house of cards.

And you are certainly not the pine-scented air.

There is just no way you are the pine-scented air.

It is possible that you are the fish under the bridge,

maybe even the pigeon on the general's head,

but you are not even close

to being the field of cornflowers at dusk.

And a quick look in the mirror will show

that you are neither the boots in the corner

nor the boat asleep in its boathouse.

It might interest you to know,

speaking of the plentiful imagery of the world,

that I am the sound of rain on the roof.

I also happen to be the shooting star,

the evening paper blowing down an alley,

and the basket of chestnuts on the kitchen table.

I am also the moon in the trees

and the blind woman's tea cup.

But don't worry, I am not the bread and the knife.

You are still the bread and the knife.

You will always be the bread and the knife,

not to mention the crystal goblet and—somehow—the wine.

Weird Science

My friend Debbie said if I put snowballs in the bath water they will fizz like alka-seltzer. So I wonder, if I put my whole freaking snowman in the tub, will it be like a whirlpool?

Black Wednesday

I got myself a man today, on Valentine's Day. Granted he's a little frosty and he's useless indoors, (OK, he's useless outdoors too) but he's mine, all mine.

And here's a poem for today.

Updated: Poems are for interpreting. Perhaps we read a bit of ourselves into them instead of reading them for what they are really about. I've had a few responses to this one I linked. I posted it, because I know what it's like to love someone and wish I didn't. Most of my separation/divorce was like that. I continued to love my ex almost against my will. Sometimes we want to stay angry and we know our own weaknesses, the power the one we love has over us, so we need to turn away because (perhaps) we need (or just want) to be angry for a while. I'm sure there are plenty of other interpretations, but that was what I got out of it. I, by no means, prescribe saving oneself from love. Love is risky, I know that as well as anyone, but I embrace love. I'm just not a fan of Valentine's Day.

Back in the Swing

Last week I completed Beginning Swing Level 2 and went to the Friday Night Swing Club after a long hiatus. I received many complements on my dress (at left*) but not many invitations to dance, unfortunately. I was feeling a little "off" with some lingering back pain so perhaps that was a good thing, although I came away from the evening disappointed. Last night I thought I'd try again. It was Valentine Dress Up (red and white 50's & 60's style) night. I wore a simple red with white dot knit top from Target with a sweetheart neckline and empire waist with some black capri pants. (Comfort was what I was after last night.) It was a much better night. I had many offers to dance, learned a few new moves and met some new people. The band was great, playing all the best swing music from the 50's and 60's.


About the dress:
I started with a very boring straight, short sleeved black dress with white dots that my friend, Tree, had handed down to me a couple years ago. I cut out the back and cut off the sleeves (they were ugly and cumbersome) thinking I would make it a halter style dress. I added the pink godets in a sheer pleated polyester to the fashion fabric and a solid pink to the lining at all the seams. After a fitting I decided to repeat the pink in the cut out back to eliminate neck strain from the halter (halters always pull on my neck) and also because I read that while dancing, it is unpleasant for the man to put his hand on a sweaty back (not that I'm very sweaty when I dance.) I thought creating a pink shrug and then attaching it to the dress would solve the undergarment problem of having to wear a backless bra. I'd still like to edge the collar with pink piping, but I just haven't had the time to do it yet. I replaced all the buttons (original were basic 4-hole black shirt buttons) with smooth 2-hole buttons. After one night of dancing (at my birthday) I discovered that the buttons didn't want to stay closed, so I also stitched the center front closed by hand most of the way, making it a pull-over dress now. I don't want to worry about my clothes staying on when I'm dancing; I want to know they will.

*Apologies for the poor quality photo. I will be photographed modeling my garments in the not so distant future, I hope.

My Royal Family

Friday is "Project Day" at Joyella's Home School Academy. Since we are studying the Middle Ages this year, and in particular, Charlemagne, this week, we made crowns like the Great Charlemagne himself wore.

Groundhog Day

The best holiday of the year is here! Happy Groundhog Day!
Why is it the best holiday you ask? Because there are no decorations, no obligations, and no expectations for this day, other than some furry rodent will be pulled out of a hole and made to predict the weather. I'm not sure why G-hog day hasn't become commercialized and over marketed like the rest, maybe because they (you know, those people who market such nonsense) couldn't think of an appropriate color to represent the day. The only big publicity this day has received is from the movie (which I thought was quite good).

Anyway, I wish you a Happy Groundhog Day. Maybe Spring will come a little bit earlier this year, I mean if Phil said so, it must be true.

Would you could you with a mouse? part II

K has been asking me all week to fetch a set of hot wheels tracks from the attic. And since today he finally lost his third tooth, I agreed to retrieve the set. After the school work had been finished and lunch was consumed, I borrowed the ladder from Oma's kitchen and climbed into the attic. I don't know if I've mentioned it lately, but I have been hearing things at night. I was pretty sure I had critters in the ceiling but today I saw the evidence: little droppings and chewed cardboard boxes. If Jasmine, our seventeen year old cat, wasn't so tired and rickety and it wasn't winter, I'd have half a mind to toss her up there for the night. I'm not a big fan of the mouse trap. I suppose the good news is I know it isn't a poltergeist making all that racket.

Putting the dream into action

Alpacas, while adorable are a lot of work, or at least I assume they are. I know absolutely nothing about raising animals for profit, but the idea is so appealing. Living in the country on a ranch/farm with nature, a garden cultivated by me and the children. The children could learn to care for the animals, I could learn how to card and spin the wool... but this is a fairly far-fetched dream given my circumstances.

Another dream I have that seems to resurface every time I meet some like-minded, creative individual, is to have a shop where we sell our creative expressions of ourselves. Tif and I have shared this dream from time to time. She's a potter/ceramics artist and now has taken a particular interest in fibers. Tree and I have shared this dream on occasion. She's an artist too, multi-talented in various media and an expert bargain hunter. MK and I have recently been toying with the idea of combining our skills (my sewing and her crochet) to produce some unique garments. Yesterday I met another talented women, Debbie, who shares the dream. She's a fellow seamstress and we were dreaming a little together too.

What would it take to put this dream into action? Money, of course... time.... and some more money, and some more time. Experience with running a business wouldn't hurt either. This is where my dream begins to evaporate. But I'm seriously considering my future these days. What do I want to be when I grow up? How can I use my gifts to support myself? What do I love? What do I know? The dream starts to come into focus again... I think the first step will be this summer. I'm talking up doing a "trunk sale" with some of my creatively gifted friends. We will invite our various circles of people to come browse our wares and maybe even sell something.

...And talk about the weather

Hey, did you know it is January. Did you? I can hardly tell. I keep thinking it's March or April and feeling like I'm in some time warp or something. My tulips are up several inches and the hyacinths too. I was wearing flip flops last night and was perfectly comfortable. I heard something on the NPR news about snowstorms and harsh winter weather somewhere in the country...maybe I should take a trip.

I happen to be one of those weirdos who likes winter. At least, I feel the only reason to have winter is so that it can snow. I really LOVE snow, even if it makes my nose pink, cold and drippy. I think snow makes the whole landscape like a dreamy fairytale--everything whitewashed and pure looking, at least for a little while before it gets mucked up with dirt and sludge.

I went to Target tonight to return something and pick up K's prescription and then just browsed around a bit. Swim suits are out. Some of you might wonder why department stores always sell swimwear in January. I did too, until I learned that in winter, the fashion industry puts out "cruise wear" in between seasons. The fall/winter line has been out and by this point is on sale and it's still too early for the spring/summer lines to be on the racks. I wonder how many people go on cruises? I have little desire if any to go on one, but seeing swimwear in January does make me long for the sun. And when the weather has been this warm it's a bit disorienting, like summer is just a couple months away.... I'm still hopeful for a few flakes but if we don't get any, I've still got a few snowballs in the freezer from last February.

Spiorad

Local musicians Bryan Rowe and Phil Munds are interviewed on WYPR, our local National Public Radio station. Their Celtic piano/french horn combinations are soothing and beautiful. You can hear a little of their music and their story on the interview.

New on the Blogroll

I've just added "A Dress A Day" to the blogroll. I don't know this blogger personally, but I happened upon her page last night looking for vintage patterns, and I think we must be kindred spirits. If you like dresses, you'll love her site. Enjoy!

Greek Tradition

My friend, Tree, is getting married this May and she has asked me to be bridesmaid. Saturday was the engagement party, which was my very first of that sort. You see, Tree comes from the Greek Orthodox Church and her parents are elated that she is finally tying the knot, so they've pulled out all the stops. I have very little experience with Greek culture and I know very few people in Tree's life. We became friends in college while we were preparing to become art teachers. So I didn't see much of that side of her life. But Saturday night, I got to see quite a bit. There was a brief ceremonial betrothing and exchanging of gold necklaces and blessings, annointing of oils, and then came the dancing. First the bride-to-be and future groom danced, not a slow, close romantic dance, but a handholding, side to side circle dance. The family of the bride and groom then joined them linking hands and then the extended families and eventually everyone was invited to join as the circle of linked people spiraled inward with the betrothed in the center. Every so often, Tree's father would throw handfuls of dollar bills in the air. Real dollars! I assume that this is symbolic of him giving a blessing of prosperity, but I'm not sure of the origin of this tradition. After several dances to traditional Greek music of people holding hands and linking arms and dancing round and round, the D.J. played some jazz, oldies and typical dance floor tunes. At one point, I glanced over and saw that Tree's father was wearing a bright red fedora and cape and was hoisted on the shoulders of some other men. Then even later, I noticed that many of the men had their shirts torn to shreds. I asked Tree about this and she simply replied, "It's Greek Tradition." (Oh, well, that explains a lot.) She added, "It's like the smashing of dishes". I can't wait for the wedding! Maybe I'll need to brush up with "Greek Weddings for Dummies" book.

I NEED MORE FRIENDS

Please join my friends list and help me discover more good films at Netflix.

Smells like burnt plastic

A few months ago someone forwarded me an email all about what it's like having boys and all the crazy stuff they do. One of the cautions was to always check the oven before turning it on. Well, I assure you that my boys are NOT the reason I need to check my oven. My daughter is the one always finding new "homes" for things. Within a minute of turning the oven on tonight to bake some chicken, smoke started pouring out of the vent. I open the oven door to see what would be causing such a foul odor and the smoke was so thick I couldn't see. I turned off the heat and as the smoke began to clear I found two plastic gears for the Gears, Gears, Gears, Robot set the children were playing with earlier. Unfortunately one gear was melted beyond function and the house smells so bad all the kids took to being outside in the cold while I tried to air out the funk.

So here's a caution to all of you with daughters as well as sons: Always check the oven before turning it on.

New Year's Hymn

We sang this hymn today in church. It was traditionally part of the New Year's Eve service in years past (we no longer have that service). Anyway, the words are good, real good, so I thought I would share them:

Peace, perfect peace, in this dark world of sin?
The blood of Jesus whispers peace within.

Peace, perfect peace, by thronging duties pressed?
To do the will of Jesus, this is rest.

Peace, perfect peace, with sorrows surging round?
On Jesus' bosom naught but calm is found.

Peace, perfect peace, with loved ones far away?
In Jesus' keeping we are safe, and they.

Peace, perfect peace, our future all unknown?
Jesus we know, and He is on the throne.

It is enough: earth's struggles soon shall cease,
And Jesus call us to heaven's perfect peace.

Edward H. Bickersteth, 1875

To all my readers, I wish you a Very Happy 2007.

Our new "pet"

You may recall that I have this dream of raising Alpacas as a family business with my children. Well, my folks gave me my very first Alpaca for Christmas. I've decided to name her "Felice". I had thought of calling her "Fleece Navidad" but thought that might be a little too corny. She is a very good "pet," since no one has to clean up after or feed her and she is only about a fifth the size of a live one. At least her fleece is real and oh, so soft!

*

The Night Before Christmas, I was stirring...

I had a really lovely day, Christmas Eve. I was blessed to share a good portion of the day in the company of some close friends at my kitchen table over some brunch. Perhaps the two cups of coffee I drank with my Bavarian Cream Puff as evening approached are why I am awake right now. Or perhaps it is because my bedroom is aglow with the Christmas lights outside and so I don't have the usual degree of darkness which I prefer for sleeping. Maybe it's the little tiny Prettiness who is sleeping in the very center of my bed, perpendicular to me, feet poking my side. Or maybe I just can not quiet my mind. Too many sugar plums dancing.

So instead of lying in bed awake, I decided to get up, have a little snack and read a chapter or two from Andree Seu's, Won't Let You Go Unless You Bless Me. I just read the essay entitled, "Omega Point, What are we working for?" and thought particularly of two brothers I know. For them and the rest of you, I want to share this excerpt. I found it quite meaningful and heartening as well. The essay begins:

Sometimes, in mid-footfall, I get confused: am I rushing about my work so that I can eat, or am I eating so that I can work? All this striving, where does it tend to, where is the payoff, the "meaning"? "All streams run to the sea, but the sea is not full; ...All the toil of man is for his mouth, yet his appetite is not satisfied" (Ecclesiastes 1:7; 6:7). Thus the intellectual pursuit of fractions of seconds at traffic lights, or while removing lint from the dryer lint trap. And then I submerge again beneath the surface of thought into the vortex of quotidian events. Till next time.

***

All this was grievous to me until I considered...
A man in the Russian Gulag had had enough. He decided he'd carried his last stone from pile A to pile B for his tormentors in this Sisyphean farce. He laid himself down to await execution by shovel blade. Just then a fellow prisoner sidled up and, wordless, traced the shape of a cross in the dust; walked away. Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn then gathered himself together and scooped up another rock- this time knowing why.
The rest is history.
"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation," quoth Henry David Thoreau. But I know a better quote: Malcolm Muggeridge said the happiest person in the world is the woman who sweeps out her house to the glory of God. She is not aware of the grievousness of her days because she has transcended them with knowledge; she has "overcome" and will receive the hidden manna and also a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to her (Revelation 2:17).

... "Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain" (1 Corinthians 15:58).
Scene 1: Willy Loman, working for Willy Loman, walks in, stage right, carrying two large sample cases: The Death of a Salesman.
Or imagine: Willy Loman, working for Jesus now, walks in, stage right, carrying two large sample cases: new play.

The whole collection of essays is definitely worth reading, and it's quite a small book, unfortunately, but it is meaty. While I have nothing more to add to her words, I will leave you with this seasonal message:

"Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace among men with whom He is pleased." (Luke 2:14)

Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

Ta Da!

The dress that had been consuming all my free time and creative energies (hence no new posts) is finished and much to my great satisfaction, also was an apparent hit at the Christmas party. Merci bien! MK, for letting me put these up! You rook mahvelous!



Okay, so about the dress. MK was inspired to have one similar to one she saw at Anthropologie. I developed a pattern, made a mock-up and once I established a good fit, we decided to raise the waistline a bit in front and remove the skirt gathers at center front to make it more flattering. The fashion fabric is a white taffeta flocked with black velveteen and the sash is black cotton velveteen cut on the bias and hand stitched in place. I underlined the fashion fabric of the bodice with white silk organza to give it more structure and less transparency in the white areas. The bodice is also supported with boning along all the seam lines except center back where there is an "invisible" black zipper. The dress is fully lined in white to maintain the "whiteness" of the taffeta. Because I was working with a limited amount of fabric that MK had purchased prior to the designing of the dress, I chose to add a black point d'esprit petticoat layer to give the dress a little more length and oomph. I'm especially proud of the motif matching I was able to achieve considering the limited yardage and a few fabric flaws I had to work around.
MK purchased the shrug and then doctored it up a bit with her crochet genius. She also made her beautiful choker and handbag! I expect this won't be the last time we combine our creative talents...

Juror #0

A few weeks ago I received notice that I had been selected for jury duty. And I know it's my civic duty and all that, but really, it's completely impractical for me at this point in my life. I filled out the form with my reasons why I couldn't do it (single-homeschooling-mom of 3 and jury duty would disrupt my children's education and providing childcare for them would be very difficult for me, etc), and today I was relieved to see that I have been excused......this time.

fire and ice cream

USECAUTION

IN THE INTEREST OF SAFETY IT IS ADVISABLE TO KEEP JOYELLA AWAY FROM FIRE AND FLAMES.

Username:

From Go-Quiz.com

Your Icecream Flavour is...Neopolitan!

You aren't satisfied with just one flavor. They say variety is the spice of life and this shines through in your Ice cream of choice! Just don't eat all the chocolate and leave the strawberry and vanilla behind!

What is your Icecream Flavour?

Find out at Go Quiz

girls in white dresses with pink satin sashes

I actually made three of these little white eyelet dresses for the grand daughters of my neighbor for a family photo op. If my own daughter wasn't so particular about what she wears, I'd make her one too.

My most current project is a retro inspired cocktail dress for my dear friend MK. I'm hoping she'll let me post the finished results here. I'm making good progress with it, and it's a good thing since she'll be wearing it to a party on 16 December.

Also I have the hankering to make loads of p.j.'s which are another favorite garment of mine to make. They are quick and fun to wear. I found some extremely delicious fabric at WalMart (of all places) for a buck a yard! If I get my rear in gear and get them photographed before I ship them off and give them as presents, I will also post them here.

My sons have expressed an interest in learning how to sew, so I have begun to teach them the basics. They made some robes (with help) from fleece fabric they picked out.

Ebay bug

My sister likes shopping on ebay. I have on occasion tracked items and looked at prices and then become overwhelmed and just went to the store to find what I needed. But today I made my first ebay purchase. The boys and I have been watching some lego star wars minifigures and sets that they would like to add to their growing collection. I've lost several bids so far, and last night I thought I had lost, but today I was given a "second chance offer". Apparently the seller actually had two of the same set and offered it to me also as the second highest bidder. So I bought it, and K still thinks I lost so he will be pleasantly surprised when he opens the Emperor Palpatine and throne seat. The set we are most anxious about "winning" is the new and hard to get X-wing fighter with six minifigures: Leia, Chewy, Han, Luke, Antilles, and R2. I tried to order it from Lego.com and it is backordered until April. Which means it wouldn't even be on time for K's birthday.

This whole concept of "winning" (buying) and "losing" (not buying) is an interesting twist to shopping. It makes a game of shopping, and I can see how it becomes highly addictive and expensive. It's amazing what some people will pay for a 2 inch high piece of plastic, and by "some people" I mean myself.

How to make a Joyella

Ingredients: 5 parts friendliness 5 parts self-sufficiency 5 parts leadership

Method: Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Top it off with a sprinkle of fitness and enjoy!

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Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

"Sprinkle of fitness"? Yeah, right.

Back to the blogging board

I've just updated to the newest version of blogger and now I've noticed all my custumized elements have evaporated into cyberspace. I'm tweaking and tuning, so please be patient because I'm already overloaded with other non-computerish tasks to do the next few weeks. For some odd reason I can't get my comments with Haloscan to work here, so I'm back to blogger for now...

In other news, I have recently inherited a vintage, customizable dress form. I was so eager to try it, I nearly got myself stuck inside it's metal meshlike cage. It's meant to be put on, with help, and molded to one's shape, I of course, tried it on alone and found myself in a potentially very embarrassing predicament. But with persistence (and brief panic) I was able to shrug it back off.

4 Tagged (again)

MaryKate tagged me on this one, and I do believe I've done it before, but for those of you who are new or forgetful I'll give it another go.

Things You May Not Have Known About Me:
Four jobs I've had in my life:

1. nanny/ day care
   
2. school librarian
   
3. art teacher
4. freelance seamstress/custom clothier
   

Four movies I would (and do) watch over and over:

1. Amelie
2. Anne of Green Gables
   
3. Pride and Prejudice
   
4. It's a Wonderful Life
   

Four places I have lived:

1. Baltimore, MD
2. Timonium, MD
   
3. The Philippines
   
4. Chantilly, VA
   

Four TV shows I love (or would love) to watch:

1. Gilmore Girls
   
2. Smallville
   
3. Numb3rs
4. (I don't really watch t.v. so I don't even know what the shows are anymore....the 3 listed above are favorites from the past couple years, but I'm sure there are better, more interesting programs that I'll never see since I don't have cable and will have forgotten about them by the time the roll out on dvd.)
   

Four Places I have been on Vacation:

1. Estes Park, CO
   
2. Les 7 Laux, France
   
3. The Netherlands
   
4. North Carolina beaches
   

Four of my favorite foods:

1. waffles
2. most non-pudding related desserts especially if chocolate, fruit or nuts are involved
   
3. roasted meat and potatoes
   
4. cheese fondue
   

Four of my favorite books (a bit redundant from a previous quiz, but hey):

1. The Bible, God (and others)
   
2. Lord of the Rings, Tolkein
   
3. The Chronicles of Narnia, Lewis
   
4. Harry Potter, Rowling
   

I'm not passing this one on, since it's come around quite a bit in the blogosphere. Rest easy all you blog-friends :D

*Hey, I'm really excited that the new version of Blogger has a functioning spellcheck! Okay, now I've got no excuses.

Zen Mom

Are You a Slacker Mom?

Your quiz results make you a Zen Mom

How do you do it? Even when explosions are all around, you are able to take a deep cleansing breath and chant your mantra "this too shall pass." You are a calming influence on your kids in a hectic world.

Take this free personality test by Clicking Here>> or going to www.areyouaslackermom.com


That's progress, eh?

Art Glass

We had a field trip to McFadden Art Glass Gallery and Studio today. What fun! Here are some pictures, and check out the website. There will be an open house with live demonstrations and refreshments on November 17th and 18th check out their website for more details. Tim makes all kinds of fabulous glass things. We happened to witness him make an ornament, bowl, pumpkin, flower and a fish today.

I love an opportunity to spread the word about local artists (especially if I think they are talented) and Tim McFadden is also the nephew of a good friend of mine, so I'm happy to give him a little free publicity here at snippets. Also availble, see the website, are classes, make-your-own-workshops, and lots of cool stuff for sale.

Too Much Chocolate

I guess I ate too much chocolate or possibly it's the chocolate covered espresso beans I ate that my sister sent me that are keeping me up, so I thought I'd make a post-birthday post.

I'm thirty-four now. I'll probably not have to tell anyone my age for many months and by then I will have forgotten my age and have to do math. It was a good day. I took us out for breakfast, part of my present to myself to have a hot breakfast without the dirty dishes. Afterward, I drove home the long way to admire the morning sun rays shining through the golden foliage.

This is my most very favorite time of year. Yesterday we were wearing shorts and t-shirts, today it was back to corduroys and jackets. Something about fall makes me contemplative. I've been thinking about a lot of things, feeling somewhat overwhelmed with my life and honestly kind of sad today. I haven't felt sad for months, so I guess I'm due. I fell climbing over a baby gate on Sunday at a birthday party and badly bruised both my kneecaps, and the kids keep bumping them with themselves and various toys and I have forgotten and tried kneeling a few times. Ouch! Physical pain sometimes feels good in the midst of emotional gloominess. It gives me something tangible to be sad about. In the midst of my black and blue knees, I have much that I am thankful for, and it is focusing on these things that helps me to pull out of the shadows.
Today I am thankful for:

1. text messages that say Happy Birthday
2. Supercool birthday songs on my voice mail
3. bacon and french toast
4. apple pie
5. Mom
6. Dad
7. big sis
8. big bro
9. my kids
10. trees in vibrant hues of gold, crimson, orange
11. grilled cheese sandwiches
12. chocolate
13. emails
14. birthday wishes
15. lots of phone calls at dinner time (usually I don't like that)
16. faithful friends
17. nasturtiums
18. a comfortable bed
19. things to look forward to
20. the giggles and wiggles of L

I guess I was thinking mostly of tangible blessings, and there are some that just go without saying, like Jesus' saving work on the cross and resurrection, answers to prayers never spoken, and all of God's creation. There are more things but since that's a nice even twenty, I'll stop there.

Thanks friends and loved ones, for making this birthday Happier.

What's New Pussycat?

L turned 3 on Monday, and I celebrate my 34th birthday today! So wish me a happy birthday or send me some chocolate, the kids aren't sharing their Halloween candy.

Little Pumpkins

Did a little pumpkin carving on Saturday with the kiddos. K and D drew the faces for theirs and I carved them, easier said then done! The littlest one, I designed for L, she loves kitties. My mom told me she saw an article or something where the pumpkins were carved with wood carving tools (like the ones I have from doing wood block cuts and linoleum cuts for printmaking in college), so I dug them out of the closet and gave it a try. I only nearly cut off my finger twice, and only drew blood once, so I consider it a success.
Although you do still need to gut the seeds and goo, the cool thing about using these tools is you don't have to cut all the way through the pumpkin, just skim off some of the outer layer and then the candle glows through when lit inside.

Beater Lickin' Good

Best part of helping mom in the kitchen is getting to lick off the beaters.

Belly Flops and Belly Rolls

I was able to get out for a little fun recreation today. I took Light Rail down to Baltimore's Inner Harbor for Flug Tag today. For those of you unfamiliar (as I was), Flug Tag is an event where people create man-powered flying machines and test their abilities to fly....landing them in the harbor. Some were designed well for flying or at least, gliding down to the water gracefully and others were just fun to watch plummet, flop, or even get hung up on the side of the platform before going down.

Then this evening spent a few hours with some girlfriends learning how to belly dance. Just watch me figure 8, belly roll, chest pop, and shimmy. It was great fun. Our instructor first performed for us a dance where she balanced lit candles on a tray on her head. Later I learned she does the same dance with a sword! Now that would have been cool to see! But the candles were pretty impressive. Not sure when I'll have opportunity to put any of these new learned skills into practice, but it was entertaining and I think that I may have created a few new synapses in my brain because of it.

Ladies only

At the risk of giving TMI... Instead (?!) of wings and strings (or those horrible belts of the 50s). I just happened upon them today in the Target.

Yesterday L discovered a "lizard" in the living room. I figured she saw one of the plastic toy ones, but she was very excited about her discovery and was urgent that I come see it. So I checked it out and much to my surprise, there was a living salamander on my livingroom floor! It was a slender little black one covered with fuzz and lint from the carpet. How and why did it get inside? I gently picked it up (they are very delicate little amphibians) and set it free outside. It was happy (I assume) to return to the damp earth.


In other news, life has accelerated and it's been difficult to keep up the posts. Generally speaking, things are good, but very busy. I am behind on many mundane things like laundry (what's new here?) and dusting. Schooling is going well. Although as it is for many home school moms, it's always a challenge to accomplish everything I hope to in a day. I was reminded yesterday at a homeschool baseball game (K and D had their very first baseball playing experience and loved it) by one of the other moms about priorities. She was sharing how she gets stressed seeing the trees instead of the forest. She said her husband asks her, "Do the kids love Jesus? are they learning His word?" And while my kids have never actually said, "Mommy, I love Jesus," they remind me when I forget to read the Bible chapter in the morning. Another friend shared with our group at WOW yesterday about how hard it is to see the fruits of her labors as mother. That sometimes we don't see the evidence of our work until twenty years down the road when the kids have moved out and are competant adults. I think that often as stay-at-home mothers our noses are too close to the big picture. We need to take a few steps back to gain a more complete perspective. Do our children love God? Are they learning His Word? and Are we being the examples we should be to our children that they can witness God's love through Christ in our actions?

Yesterday, my daughter told me I am her hero. And while this filled me with motherly pride, it also reinforced my desire to be the mother she needs me to be (pointing her to the Ultimate Hero). It isn't an easy job, but it certainly is a worthwhile one.

Disposable II

It looks like I'm not the only one concerned about the disposable mentality of our culture. MK from Ganap! has put this bug in my ear. Interesting remarks by artistists, artisans, and regular consumer folk.

After reading chapter 4: Filling our lives with things, from "Temptations Women Face", I have been thinking more on this topic. As a general rule, I have pretty much given up on mall shopping, unless I need something from a specific store only found in the mall (or I want to see something I saw online in person), because years ago I discovered that the mall shopping mentality breeds discontentment. I'm not much of a shopper anyway. But I've noticed that my kids lives are being filled with junk. Junky toys and crappy gadgets. When M and I first started our family we wanted to keep a simple toy policy: nothing that makes noises, requires batteries, or is associated with a television show. We instead provided our boys with blocks and other wooden toys and lots of books...but the junk started rolling in around K's 3rd birthday. The thing is, they love their junky stuff. L collects it in bags and totes it all over the house. Dumping and refilling is a daily ritual for her.

The real problem I'm finding is in maintaining balance. How to appreciate what we have, to enjoy it, take care of it, and not constantly wish for more, bigger, better things. To see and enjoy cool toys or beautifully made home goods (or fabrics *sigh*) and not feel the nagging urge to possess them. I'm trying to instill the concept of giving with my children. When the toys seem to get to be too much, or when they say they are bored, I know it's time to whittle down our collection. Sometimes I box up stuff and put it out of sight for a while, but other times we just give it all away. One concept I agreed with that author Mary Ellen Ashcroft brings out in chapter 4, was about how giving (not selling) helps to promote contentment. She writes, " Giving shatters our sense that what we have is our own. Generosity flows out, greed pulls in."

But another approach is to just resist the urge to by cheap crappy stuff in the first place. Dollar stores and "Mart" stores prey on our desire for lots of stuff for very few dollars. I admit that one of my sons' favorite toys came from the Dollar Tree. It's a set of plastic tropical frogs. They haven't broken (they are nearly indestructible) and they use them in so many kinds of play, even painting them with their own designs. But for the most part that kind of stuff doesn't last a week, let alone a day, and what does that teach our children? It was easier saying no to stupid, impulse buys like these when I wasn't a single mom. But now (as I assume is the case for M, by all the junk the kids bring home with them) it is harder to say no, because somewhere deep inside I think I can make up for their loss of a father with buying them stuff.

More fashion show pictures here, and this one has a sightly better shot of me in my dress.

VIP Exclusive Fashion Show

I was in D.C. Friday night attending my very first, live fashion show. Watch the previous one here . Three local designers were showcasing their fall lines: Saeyoung Vu, Unsung, and Kimberly Kouture. A friend of mine has an in with the CEO of VIP Exclusive and so, not only were we front row to the fashion show, we also had passes to the exclusive upstairs party room. This all sounds a bit more glamorous than it really was, but I did see a lot of really cool dresses on really fierce looking models.

I couldn't turn off my dress-maker's eye as I noticed ill-fitting garments and unbalanced hemlines. The clothes were obviously not made for the models sporting them. Something only a custom clothier would notice. One poor dear had a "wardrobe malfunction" as her strapless gown plummeted below her breast on one side. Fortunately she was wearing a similarly colored strapless bra underneath (phew!). I also noticed a dress with spaghetti straps tied together with ribbon in the back and a skirt that was all hooched up and puckered because the booty inside it was too much for it to handle. It made me realize why models are expected to be a certain size to best display a design...and yet I was also glad to see less than perfect female bodies strutting the cat walk.

I came away from the show with a bunch of questions, of which my friend got an earful, but he didn't know the answers. Another cool thing about the evening is that there may be potential opportunities for networking in the fashion biz...we shall see.

Oh, I wore a new dress I made to the affair (see me sitting on the far left? more pics here), I will try to post one later this week.

SDG

Women on Wednesday (WOW) is an opportunity at my church for women to come together for a time of fellowship, praise and learning. There is usually a potpourri of classes that meet for about an hour and a half after our time altogether. This semester I have joined the class reading the book "Temptations Women Face: Honest Talk About Jealousy, Anger, Sex, Money, Food, Pride" by Mary Ellen Ashcroft. I'm still sorting out my thoughts on this book and the chapters I've read thus far. I wonder where is the line between pride as sin and pride as knowing we've done well and acknowledging it? I was reminded of this recently when in a conversation with a certain narcissist, I tried to take credit for how well the kids are doing. In conversation with other people (friends and family mostly) I usually remember to point any success I'm having with them back to the Lord. But I realized after the fact that I still have a residual urge to gain his approval and recognition for a tough job under tough circumstances. If I don't let go of that, I will always be disappointed with such conversations. Soli Deo Gloria....To God alone be the Glory.

SDG - Soli Deo Gloria

J S Bach appended these initials at the end of each of his Cantatas scores.

Inquiring Minds Like Mine

....want to know what happened to the huge spider that was in the bathtub last night, and couldn't seem to find it's way out? I was too tired and it was too late to get the "death vac" out, so I squirted it with some bug spray, thinking it would sedate it or something. This morning when I got up and peeked in, it was nowhere to be found. I can only hope it crawled down the drain and got stuck...Did I mention it was gargantuan?

The Renfest

I went to the Maryland Renaissance Festival on Saturday. And despite the gloomy, misty weather, it didn't put a damper on the day. As you can see, I dressed up for the occasion...I ended up making the outfit even though I set out to borrow one from a friend. I restyled an old fashioned cotton nightgown with eyelet trim into a peasant blouse and petticoat, gathered some calico into a skirt and finally found a use for the one yard of ultra suede someone gave me. It made a perfect vest. Even though I prefer the higher Renaissance fashions of lords and ladies, I think the peasant/bar maiden look suits me fine (and it's much less labor intensive to construct).

Hack and Slash were by far the best act going on. I laughed so hard my face ached afterwards... the artisians were, as usual, inspiring and the smells of food were fantastic. I was provided with the most thorough picnic ever which, because of the wet conditions and forgotten blanket, became a tailgate lunch for two. I was a little overwhelmed with all the variety, but it was all tasty and the company wasn't bad either. ;)

Wonderfallen

I think part of the reason I don't read as much as I'd like to is, when I get into a really, I mean really good book, I don't want it to end. The same is true for movies, and yet going in I know in roughly two hours (three if I'm lucky) it will have ended. It makes me a little sad, even if the endings are happy, jubilant or triumphant, because I become so absorbed into that world with those people it's almost like losing new friends. I felt this way with Wonderfalls. The show had one season (that I know of on DVD), a three disk series, approximately twelve hours, that I devoured in a matter of two weeks or less. Fortunately, the girl does get the boy in the last episode.

Speaking of which, I never before enjoyed watching people kiss in movies or television, but I have lately... hmmm. I used to think it was lame that older, single women, widows and "old maids" would watch romantic movies to live vicariously through the characters... I'm hoping it's more so a result of my liking the particular characters in Wonderfalls and wanting them to end up together that was generating such a response.

Unlike some of my avid reader friends, I'm not as satisfied rereading the books (or replaying the shows) until I've pretty much forgotten them. A big part of the enjoyment for me is the surprise of what is yet to come.


Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Friends of friends

Lately it seems I owe thanks to certain friends for connecting me to new friends. This is the way friendship should work, I think, a tangled web (no pun intended) of relationships. One friend in particular has connected me with several good people, kindred spirits even, for which I am ever grateful. This same person was the one who first introduced me to the blogosphere. In his latest post, there is a link to a very concise, informative, podcast interview with Salimah Perkins which I'd link here myself, but I can't seem to find the proper url. I've added her blog, Baltimore Chronicles, to my blogroll, because she's a real writer and a personal friend of a friend...let's keep the web spinning.

Disposable

I read that during the time of WWII when people became more frugal with everything, that this hurt the fashion industry (among other industries) quite a bit. Unlike today, when people can buy cheaply made inexpensive clothes, things were made to last. That wasn't the problem so much as the fact that because people were paring down, they couldn't afford to buy new, nicely crafted, more expensive garments that last. And so the Americans of this generation learned to mend and darn. Actually, I think people have been mending and darning for thousands of years prior, but perhaps the war hit at the time of the birth of disposable things, and so Americans went back to mending and darning. I think that for the people of this frugal generation, the idea of mending and darning and saving and reusing was a hard one to give up. For some of them they continue with these old ways, even to absurdity.

People who mend and darn and reuse and remake are odd, eccentric even. I should know because I'm one of them. We look at things and determine their worth based on their potential. But there is certainly a point at which you say, this needs to be replaced. I'm a firm believer in giving old things a second life. I'm often taking old garments apart and remaking them, or using the fabric from something to make another thing. But this only works when the integrity of the material is still in tact.

I recently had a client ask me to mend a bed sheet. This bed sheet in particular was one that I had "mended" about five years ago. She had me cut it down the middle and sew the outside selvage edges into a center seam. "That way I can get more wear out of it, since it was wearing thin in the middle," she told me. Well it was work at a time when I needed it, so I did it, although I think it is completely ridiculous to put seams in bedsheets. I don't care how nice the cotton is (or in this case was). This same sheet came back to me a few weeks ago, ripped in several places and with a whole piece missing. It was even patched back together wrong by some amateur. Fabrics wear out. They dry rot. They become thread bare. I did my best with the sheet, it looked awful and terribly uncomfortable. One firm tug on the sheet over a rough toenail and "rrrrriiiiiiiippppp" it'll be in shreds once again.

Philoxenia

Today I learned that the Greek word for hospitality is directly translated "love of strangers". Isn't that cool? Well, today I was on the receiving end of that concept as my sister's friend from Georgia (whom I've never met) invited me to attend a cookout she was having while visiting nearby. How could I resist the offer to come to a beautiful farm in the country complete with a pond, swimming pool, hot tub, and trampoline? It seemed an appropriate way to spend the afternoon with the children, so I accepted and got to meet Julie's friends and their friends. We all had a really nice time. I'm not sure why, but it didn't even feel weird coming to a party where I knew absolutely no one. Perhaps it was because I've invited strangers to parties myself.

Two Memorial Days ago, I invited Everett, a man I met online from a divorce support chat room, to my Bible Study group's bbq at my home. He's a truck driver, and his tractor trailer had broken down in Baltimore leaving him stranded in a hotel room with his dog. He mentioned this in the chat room and my ears perked up at the word "Baltimore" so I chatted with him a little bit more. His truck took much longer than expected to be repaired and he had been in town for nearly a week when Memorial Day was approaching. I can't really explain it, I think it was God, but it was strongly impressed upon my heart to invite this stranger to my home for the bbq. I prayed about it, because I wasn't sure how "safe" he was and I didn't know much about him, but all I can say is that it felt like the right thing to do, and so I did it. My friend Anne, happened to bring her sister along and she and Everett hit it off immediately, they've been together ever since. Last month I learned they are engaged to be married!

I love this story, and I finally had a reason to share it with all of you...I guess the moral is love a stranger and you may change their life. Or perhaps the moral is trust your gut instinct, well at least that's what my therapist kept telling me to do, so I finally tried it and it turned out pretty well.

9 questions book meme

MaryKate tagged me. I'm not a huge reader. I like books and once I get into a good one, I have a lot of trouble putting it down, I actually become a little obsessed with finishing it. So maybe that's why I don't always have one that I'm reading (for pleasure that is). I wasn't terribly excited to do this meme, since I haven't read all the great books yet....eventually I'll get to them. That's what I love most about the classical education I'm giving my kids.

1. One book that changed your life? As a person: Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. As a woman: A return to Modesty by Wendy Shalit. As a Christian: Knowing with the Heart by Roy Clouser.
2. One book you have read more than once? The Chronicles of Narnia and countless other children's books that are on our shelves.
3. One book you would want on a desert island? The Bible, that way I'd actually read it cover to cover (or The Brother's Karamozov -I've started that one a few times but never been able to get "into" it and everyone has such great things to say about it.)
4. One book that made you cry? (Just one?) Goodbye Jeanine by Joyce Sackett made me cry more than any other book I've read, but for obvious reasons.
5. One book that made you laugh? Can You Keep a Secret? by Sophia Kinsella.
6. One book you wish had been written? A very practical divorce handbook/survival guide.
7. One book you wish had never had been written? Same as #6.
8. One book you are currently reading? The Well Trained Mind by Susan Wise Bauer
9. One book you have been meaning to read? Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain by Betty Edwards (for about 10 years now)

I am supposed to tag 5 people but I think all the bloggers I know have done this already...so here are a few people who don't blog but are avid readers and maybe they could post their answers in comments? Mom, Julie, Inge, (and Tif if she ever actually read my blog)

On the mend

Thanks for all the well-wishes...the antibiotics are doing their job and I'm much improved. I spent the past couple of days in a log cabin with my children my two x-sils (ex-sisters-in-law) and their children at Sandy Cove. We had a really nice time swimming, playing mini-golf, exploring the grounds, monkeying around on the playground, etc. Today while packing and cleaning up to head home, L locked my keys in my minivan. Just Monday, the boys had asked me if I had ever locked my keys in the car before, and I proudly said, "No, I have never locked my keys in the car before." Now I'm not superstitious, I don't knock on wood, but isn't that a strange coincidence? My "sisters" were great though, and helped me get the help I needed to get on the road (my phone and wallet were in the car too). By the time the tow truck driver arrived to jimmy the lock, I was no longer feeling stressed.

My other big news is that when I arrived home there were some packages waiting for me (some accessories for...) and a few hours later that big brown truck rumbled up the hill to deliver my new Dell Inspiron! My old computer bit the dust Sunday night, so it couldn't have been better timing. Now I'm learning this new gadget, oh, it can do really cool stuff, like make phone calls and burn cds and play dvds and, and....I'm as giddy as a school girl! The kids are psyched too, because now their games will play at regular speed.

wonder-itis

So, I'm still sick, and since I've become sick and tired of being sick and tired, and pretty sure my body isn't going to conquer whatever it is that is ailing me, I finally went to a doctor. Turns out I've got a whole bunch of -itis : bronchitis, pharangitis, tonsilitis. I've taken the opportunity of being sick and tired to become a bit of a couch potato and have watched lots of movies and television. Last night I spent the evening watching season 1 episodes of Wonderfalls which I greatly enjoyed. I particularly liked the juxtaposition of quirkiness, gen-Y underachievementism, disfunctional family relations, and the subtle transformation of one darkly sarcastic Brown University philosophy grad into a slightly less sarcastic and somwhat caring young woman. The question of destiny is constantly at play as inanimate toy animals and statues become animate and speak to Jaye Tyler telling her to do peculiar things. She finds that when she doesn't listen, bad things happen, although sometimes even good comes from these bad things. When she does the little animals bidding, it works out unexpectedly for some greater good, with usually bizarre results. She's not sure if she is going crazy, if God (or Satan?) is speaking to her directly or if she is just destiny's puppet.

Tracked

Once upon a time I was an art teacher in a rinky-dink Christian school in Catonsville. I was thrilled to have employment, but overwhelmed by the range of classes I'd be teaching my first year out of college: pre-kindergarden through eighth grade. On top of all this the school had very limited funds, no existing curriculum and the art room was a complete disaster. I soon learned that the previous art teachers had all been packrats hoarding all sorts of useless junk with the thought that it could be made into something. I was up to my ears in an organizational nightmare with very little compensation. The thing that inspired me to return to teach for two more years was the student body. The eighth graders in particular became my pet class. They even invited me along on their end of year trip to chaperon. I was tickled to go, these kids were fun to be around, even if I had to act like a responsible adult in their presence. In fact, the following year, the school just wasn't the same without them. Welllllll, fast forward ten years into the age of myspace, reunion.com and classmates.com .....my eighth graders are college graduates now- the same age I was when I taught them, some have married, some have started families and they've tracked me down to invite me to a ten year reunion in the Spring.

2 year blog-birthday

Wow, I've been at this for two years now...over 10,000 visits to this blog so far! Who are all of you people reading about my life?!

I'm happy to say that the original purpose and context for this blog has evolved for the better, although I can not attest that the content has much improved. I had grand ideas of summarizing the high points (or at least the most humorous) over the past two years, but since I'm sicker than a child's kitchen experiment, I will spare myself the trouble. However, if you have a particular favorite entry, I'd love to hear which one it is. Perhaps it'll cheer me into health.

Sick in the head

A few weeks ago, my children were sick with headcolds. The majority of symptoms cleared up, but the boys had nagging coughs that plagued them mostly at night. I was feeling kind of smug that I hadn't caught the virus when I heard that M, the children's father, had come down with it right before his beach vacation. But now, my body has finally given up fighting and I am consumed with the sore throat, stuffy head, coughing, sneezing and general malaise. The boys are having a relapse, I guess, since the coughing has worsened and they have had sporadic fevers. I'm sure it didn't help my recovery that I stayed up past midnight watching Alfred Hitchcock's Anatomy of a Murder with Jimmy Stewart. I must have had an "irresistble impulse" which caused this "insanity". It was two hours and forty minutes long, but very good all the way through. Hollywood has definitely lost it's touch, but then again, I'm partial to anything with Stewart or by Hitchcock. I was especailly surprised by the use of such words as "spermogenesis, panties" and "rape" in this film. You just don't hear that kind of mature language in those oldies very often. Oh and here's another reason to check out this old film, Duke Ellington does the entire soundtrack! (And there's a pretty good scene of swing dancers in action too.)

If you have seen Anatomy, I'd love to hear if you thought Manion was really guilty or not.There are still a lot of unanswered questions at the end.


**errata: Anatomy of a Murder is NOT an Alfred Hitchcock film, it was directed by Otto Preminger...I guess I assumed it was so because Netflix had it listed with all my favorite Hitchcock movies as a recommendation. My apologies for the misinformation.

At table

Now that the boys are getting older and more articulate, we have more conversations and discussions at mealtimes, (that is, instead of just noise). At lunch today D presented an example of typical family discourse. I will try to transcribe it to the best of my recollection:

D: Mommy what is your worst food?
Me: Hmmm, liver, no, anything slimy and bitter
D: What is your worst drink?
Me: (laughing) anything slimy and bitter
D: What is your worst color?
Me: Throw-up color
K: Oh, me too.
D: Mommy, if there was only slimy, bitter things to eat and drink and everything was throw-up color, what would you do? Would you eat and drink or would you die?
Me: I'd die.
D: Yeah, me too.
K: I wouldn't, I'd want to live.
K: But drinks aren't slimy, Mommy.
Me: Raw eggs are slimy.
K: That's not a drink.
Me: Some people crack raw eggs into a glass and drink it.
K: ewwww

I could have steered this conversation into another direction... but half the fun is just seeing where these conversations will go naturally, when they ask the questions.

in the name of science

Just for the sake of scientific curiosity, I know you all are wondering how that bruise is getting on. Well, it's just gettin' perttier and perttier. I bet Target could use it for one of their ads.

Saturday blahs

I finished my last beginner level swing dance class on Wednesday. Chuck, my instructor, told me I was "smooth," I believe he meant my dancing. His assistant also told me I was doing really well, that I had good form, etc. But last night, I danced with a maniac, and suffered a fall. I wasn't doing arials folks, he pushed me hard and inadvertantly tripped me with his wild footwork, and I went sailing acrosss the dance floor to the foot of the stage. My injuries consist of a badly bruised and scraped knee, and today, a case of the blahs... He didn't even help me up! The guy did finally (about an hour later) come over and apologized and then asked me to dance again. I politely declined. I resolve to never dance with him again. But what is it with the men out there? Why are some men so self-absorbed they can't tell they've completely missed the mark? Chuck said, in class, that it's the man's job to make the woman look good on the dance floor, especially with swing. How is it a man can trip a woman and not offer her a hand? It makes me mad. I'm angry that there are immature, narcissistic men who don't know how to be a gentleman. I'm angry that I put up with it. Another much older man I danced with told me he wished he could bottle my sense of humor because there were "so many uptight women" at the dance. If only I had told him how uncomfortable a dance partner he was. He was too rough, and yet, since no one else was asking I danced three songs with him, and it wasn't funny anymore.

In all fairness there were a number of "smooth" gentleman that I danced with too, they even taught me a few new steps, but somehow I feel like a magnet to the freaks....is it because I'm too nice? hmmmmmm

update: Mood has improved today, knee, however looks worse and feels the same, "ouch."